Barbara Mertz Quotes

When emotion supersedes reason ... gullibility must follow.

I disapprove of matrimony as a matter of principle.... Why should any independent, intelligent female choose to subject herself to the whims and tyrannies of a husband? I assure you, I have yet to meet a man as sensible as myself! (Amelia Peabody)

Peculiar or not, it is my idea of pleasure. Why, why else do you lead this life you don't enjoy it? Don't talk of duty to me; you men always have some high-sounding excuse for indulging yourselves. You go gallivanting over the earth, climbing mountains, looking for the sources of the Nile; and expect women to sit dully at home embroidering. I embroider very badly. I think I would excavate rather well.

No woman really wants a man to carry her off; she only wants him to want to do it.

Dogs can be made to feel guilty about anything, including the sins of their owners. Cats refuse to take the blame for anything - including their own sins.

Marriage, in my view, should be a balanced stalemate between equal adversaries.

I am so tired of ruggedly handsome heroes. I don't know too many ruggedly handsome people who are necessarily nice people. In fact, the beautiful people have a big handicap because they rely too much on their appearance and don't bother to become interesting.

Who are we really? Combinations of common chemicals that perform mechanical actions for a few years before crumbling back into the original components? Fresh new souls, drawn at random for some celestial cupboard where God keeps an unending supply?Or the same soul, immortal and eternal, refurbished and reused through endless lives, by that thrifty Housekeeper? In Her wisdom and benevolence She wipes off the memory slates, as part of the cleaning process, because if we could remember all the things we have experienced in earlier lives, we might object to risking it again.

Emerson,' I said, choosing my words with care, 'it is a sheer drop from the cleft down to the base of the cliff. If you are bent on breaking your arm or your leg or your neck or all three, find a place closer to home so we won't have to carry you such a distance.

there is nothing like a garden to rest the soul.

The only way to do it is to do it: by writing, writing, writing.

Cats always made up to the people who hated them the most. Depending on how you chose to look at it, it was a touching manifestation of trust, or a malicious pleasure in human discomfort.

I will tell you a little secret about archaeologists, dear Reader. They all pretend t be very high-minded. They claim that their sole aim in excavation is to uncover the mysteries of the past and add to the store of human knowledge. They lie. What they really want is a spectacular discovery, so they can get their names in the newspapers and inspire envy and hatred in the hearts of their rivals.

A man asking for help ought to at least give directions.

I knew the answer, and--of course--so did Ramses. He has superb breath control and always gets in ahead of me.

Noble causes have a deplorable effect on the morals of the persons who espouse them.

Is is difficult to be angry with a gentleman who pays you compliments, even impertinent compliments. Especially impertinent compliments.

Martyrdom is often the result of excessive gullibility.

Most men are reasonably useful in a crisis. The difficulty lies in convincing them that the situation has reached a critical point

Cats always pick the laps of the people who don't like them.

I do not scruple to employ mendacity and a fictitious appearance of female incompetence when the occasion demands it.

The approval of a cat cannot but flatter the recipient.

Sekhmet crawled onto Ramses's lap and began to purr. 'The creature oozes like a furry slug,' said Ramses, eyeing it without favor.

It may take us a little longer to reach the summit, but never fear, we will get there!

People who relate what they believe to be new and startling information like to have such information received with exclamations of astonishment and admiration.

Conventional history completely ignores half the human race.

Now, Mama, Papa, and sir," said Ramses, "please withdraw to the farthest corner and crouch down with your backs turned. It is as I feared; we will never break through by this method. The walls are eight feet thick. Fortunately I brought along a little nitroglycerin--" "Oh, good Gad," shrieked Inspector Cuff.

Money was the manure of politics.

Your trousers are on fire. I would have told you, but you so dislike advice.

I never meant to marry. In my opinion, a woman born in the last half of the nineteenth century of the Christian era suffered from enough disadvantages without willfully embracing another.

It's not unsporting to thrash a cowardly cad,' said Simmons. 'Everyone knows you don't fight like a gentleman.' 'That might be called an oxymoron,' Ramses said. 'Oh--sorry. Bad form to use long words. Look it up when you get home.' The poor devil didn't know how to fight, like a gentleman or otherwise.

kissing someone out of pity is always a mistake.

It was hate at first sight, clean, pure and strong as grain alcohol.

A fondness for martyrdom, especially of the verbal variety, is common to the young.

The combination of physical strength and moral sincerity combined with tenderness of heart is exactly what is wanted in a husband.--Ameila Peabody

Loving someone condemns you to a lifetime of fear. You become painfully conscious of how fragile people are - bundles of brittle bones and vulnerable flesh, breeding grounds for billions of deadly germs and horrible diseases.

Spring is always cruel, with its false promise of resurrection.

Nefret had always had an uncanny ability to read his thoughts. 'Did she cry?' she asked sweetly. 'And then you kissed her? You shouldn't have done that. I'm sure you meant well, but kissing someone out of pity is always a mistake.

I do, however, think it would be difficult to write books I don't like to read.

I've been reading ghost stories ever since I could read. I'm immensely curious about ghosts and UFOs and all that stuff, but I'm a very hard-headed person.

I can do a book in three months if I spend all day, seven days a week at it and, in fact, I work better that way.

Giving other people advice is one of the most irritating and useless activities known to man.

Nothing looks as self-satisfied as a contented cat.

Getting an idea for a book is not the problem, but you need 300 ideas - an idea a page.

Children, I feel, are as much entitled to privacy as human beings.

Husbands do not care to be contradicted. Indeed, I do not know anyone who does.

It is easier to counterfeit old age than youth.

Sometimes the characters develop almost without your knowing it. You find them doing things you hadn't planned on, and then I have to go back to page 42 and fix things. I'm not recommending it as a way to write. It's very sloppy, but it works for me.

Writing is like a bird-watcher watching for birds: the stories are there: you just have to train yourself to look for them.

I would never have supposed that inexperienced girl was capable of such cold-blooded, calculating manipulation!