Golf Quotes

Golf is the closest game to the game we call life. You get bad breaks from good shots; you get good breaks from bad shots - but you have to play the ball where it lies.

As I watched the seagulls, I thought, That's the road to take; find the absolute rhythm and follow it with absolute trust.

I believe nicotine plus caffeine equals protein.

Life is nothing but a memory. People who dwell on the bad ones aren't going to have a whole lot of good ones coming up.

The main idea in golf as in life, I suppose is to learn to accept what cannot be altered and to keep on doing one's own reasoned and resolute best whether the prospect be bleak or rosy.

There are only two types of player-those who keep their nerves under control and win championships, and those who do not.

This fitness thing is blown out of proportion. What am I going to do on a treadmill - smoke a cigarette and drink a diet Coke?

Resolve never to quit, never to give up, no matter what the situation.

Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course... the space between your ears.

When it blows here, even the seagulls walk.

A smart girl is one who knows how to play tennis, golf, piano -- and dumb.

The worse you're performing, the more you must work mentally and emotionally. The greatest and toughest art in golf is "playing badly well." All the true greats have been masters at it.

Do not be tempted to invest in a sample of each golfing invention as soon as it makes its appearance. If you do, you will only complicate and spoil your game - and encumber your locker with useless rubbish.

I used to play golf. I wanted to be a better player, but after a while I realized I'd always stink. And that's when I really started to enjoy the game.

I enjoy the oohs! and aahs! from the gallery when I hit my drives. But I'm getting pretty tired of the awws! and uhhs! when I miss the putt.

My slogan is who needs fitness when you've got great equipment.

The older you get the stronger the wind gets - and it's always in your face.

You might as well praise a man for not robbing a bank as to praise him for playing by the rules.

I learned you can't drink whiskey and play golf.

Do I have to know rules and all that crap? Then forget it.

The real way to enjoy playing golf is to take pleasure not in the score, but in the execution of strokes.

Emerald as heavy as a golf course, ruby as dark as an afterbirth, diamond as white as sun on the sea.

I wasn't this nervous playing golf when I was drinking. It's the first tournament I've won on the PGA Tour in a sober manner, so it's a great feeling knowing I can do it sober. I don't think two years ago I could have pulled this off.

Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course

One travels like a golf ball, hopping from green to green.

The Universal Law is impartial. It will give you anything you believe. It will throw you garbage or roses depending on the energy you put in. You are the one in charge, and you must accept that and stand alone. If you think God is coming down to fix things for you, forget it. God is out playing golf.

You can spend the money on new housing for poor people and the homeless, or you can spend it on a football stadium or a golf course.

I know this golf tournament has my name on it but it's not about me. It's about the Louisiana Tech family. There is nothing greater than being a part of the Bulldog family.

A kid grows up a lot faster on the golf course. Golf teaches you how to behave.

It takes hundreds of good golf shots to gain confidence, but only one bad one to lose it.

You swing your best when you have the fewest things to think about.

If he's got golf clubs in his truck or a camper in his driveway, I don't hire him.

My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch.

The object of golf is to beat someone. Make sure that someone is not yourself.

You can't win them all but you can try.

Every great player has learned the two Cs: how to concentrate and how to maintain composure.

But in the end it's still a game of golf, and if at the end of the day you can't shake hands with your opponents and still be friends, then you've missed the point.

When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars - that's heaven here on earth.

Golf is the only game I know of that actually becomes harder the longer you play it.

I never learned anything from a match that I won.

I've got the drinkers and the smokers and the eaters on my side.

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.

The toughest opponent of all is Old Man Par. He's a patient soul who never shoots a birdie and never incurs a bogey. And if you would travel the long road with him, you must be patient, too.

Seems I used to do everything like I was on a mission. If it was alcohol, I wanted to drink till I couldn't see straight. If it was golf, I wanted to beat everybody's brains out. If it was driving, I can get there faster'n you can. It's not anybody's fault, I guess. I was stubborn as hell. I had no direction.

It's a funny thing, the more I practice the luckier I get.

After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye.

To give yourself the best possible chance of playing to your potential, you must prepare for every eventuality. That means practice.

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

The most rewarding things you do in life are often the ones that look like they cannot be done.

My attitude toward punctuation is that it ought to be as conventional as possible. The game of golf would lose a good deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. You ought to be able to show that you can do it a good deal better than anyone else with the regular tools before you have a license to bring in your own improvements.