Al Swearengen Quotes

You can't slit the throat of everyone whose character it would improve.

The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back.

Pain or damage don't end the world.

Announcing your plans is a good way to hear God laugh.

The obvious merits utterance. Character is f**king pertinent.

Don't I yearn for the days when a draw across the throat made f**king resolution.

Change ain't looking for friends. Change calls the tune we all dance to.

Bloodletting on my premises that I ain't approved I take as a f***ing affront. It puts me off my feed.

Yeah, the cut throats and the pigs. But who wants all that blood spilled, judge, huh? Isn't there a simpler way of not pissing off the big vipers?

I wouldn't trust a man who wouldn't try to steal a little.

The question is: until reinforced, can we learn the ways of church mice.

Let's leave it all alone. I'm stupidest when I try to be funny.

Act averse to nasty language and partial to fruity tea.