1.
I'm the type to have a bullet-proof condom and still gotta pull out.
Big Sean
2.
No one has invented a condom for the pen yet. My pen is still sexy.
Khushwant Singh
3.
You know you're in love when you wear condoms while having sex with other women.
Owen Wilson
4.
If condoms and potentially microbicides can prevent millions of deaths [from AIDS], they should be made more widely available. I know that there are those who, out of sincere religious conviction, oppose such measures. And with these folks, I must respectfully but unequivocally disagree.
Barack Obama
6.
Condoms will break, but I can assure you that vows of abstinence will break more easily than condoms.
Joycelyn Elders
7.
Arnold Schwarzenegger looks like a brown condom full of walnuts.
Clive James
9.
but I don't want to wear a condom because I don't feel anything," and she says calmly... glaring at me,"If you don't use one you're not going to feel anything anyway.
Bret Easton Ellis
10.
There is not only a lack of success for condoms. It's worse than that - they are utter failures.
Wendy Wright
11.
An amicable divorce is like a ventilated condom; it just doesn't work.
Rita Rudner
12.
The condom has saved so many lives and it'll save so many more lives. We really owe a great deal to the rubber tree.
Mechai Viravaidya
13.
Put a condom in their hand and hope it don't bust.
Coolio
14.
Here are my Mommy Messages: Wear a condom and test your Molly.
Ayelet Waldman
15.
You know, we are one nation under a god. Yes, you were right. An angry, crack slinging god who decorates with bullets and spent condoms.
Henry Rollins
16.
I don't wear no condom and I don't plan for no kids.
Bill Cosby
17.
If we can just get young people to do the same as their fathers did, that is, wear condoms
Richard Branson
18.
I have a couple of 'doing caps' in my wallet. That's what I call condoms.
Aziz Ansari
19.
A condom is a rubber thing shaped like a wiener that hums.
Bill Engvall
20.
I have no ability to develop muscle tone. I could do situps all day and still look like a condom full of walnuts.
Dana Gould
21.
Oh yeah, this was so comforting. Like a porcupine in a condom factory.’ (Danger)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
22.
About President Bush's stand against condoms, condoms will not protect you from AIDS . So to just throw a bunch of condoms over to Africa and say, here, we're helping you with AIDS, is just going to further the spread of AIDS over there.
Christine O'Donnell
23.
So, did the costume come with a condom, or is that sold separately?
Rachel Vincent
24.
Some men send me condoms and underpants. I'm not sure what they want.
Martine McCutcheon
25.
Do you happen to have another Condom? I think I've discovered the cure for headaches.
Stephen King
26.
I think the Americans fished out the same condom but found it had too many holes in it.
Tariq Ali