1.
It's never your successful friends posting the inspirational quotes
Damien Fahey
2.
Forget the Bible, the greatest argument against human evolution is a YouTube comment thread.
Damien Fahey
3.
Rappers shouldn't have to file taxes because they itemize everything they own in songs.
Damien Fahey
4.
No one's dream job involves a kiosk.
Damien Fahey
5.
Paul Ryan looks like the car rental salesman who bullies you into getting full coverage.
Damien Fahey
6.
Before taking the stage, Paul Ryan spent 6 hours staring into a mirror working on 'concerned eyebrow.'
Damien Fahey
7.
My other car is a vehicle with a bumper sticker describing this car.
Damien Fahey
8.
My life is now a constant assessment of whether what's happening in real life is more entertaining than what's happening on my phone.
Damien Fahey