David Lee Roth Quotes

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.

Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.

I would just like to say that after all these years of heavy drinking, bright lights and late nights, I still don't need glasses. I drink right out of the bottle.

If you subtracted all of the great artists who never drank, who never went to excess, you wouldn't have any more art left. What kind of poem are you gonna get out of a glass of iced tea?

The perfect woman has an IQ of 150, wants to make love until 4 in the morning, then turns into a pizza!

When I die, sprinkle my ashes over the 80's.

I'm not conceited. Conceit is a fault and I have no faults.

Remember, life is just a game and no one gets out alive

If you want to split a bottle with a friend, then Sammy Hagar is your guy. If you want to split your friend with a bottle than give me a call.

If you put a Van Halen album in your record collection, it will melt all the rest of your records.

He who knows how will always work for he who knows why.

Well a good writer writes, a good musician listens to a lot more than he actually composes, and if you're going to do lyrics - well, there's a Freudian slip. That's not even a slip, that's a Freudian move: I said going to do lyrics. If you really want it to ring true, you'll live it first. Go really get your heart broken!

For the last 30 years, I've been leading a life of crime and international intrigue that's involved 40 stamps in my passport, love affairs, and broken hearts to go with each one of them. You would have to live three lifetimes to catch up with just the allegations that follow me!

People say that life is a cesspool of darkness and dispair. Well we of Van Halen are sailing through it in a yacht!

Van Halen can keep providing the rain and I'll keep providing the parade.

Women are great. When they dig you, there's nothing they won't do. That kind of loyalty is hard to find - unless you've got a good dog.

We've all got out self-destructive bad habits, the trick is to find four or five you personally like the best and just do those all the time.

When you can spell subpoena without thinking about it, that's when you know you've made it.

I'm a family oriented guy; I've personally started four or five this year.

The Breakfast of Champions isn't cereal, it's the competition!

It dont matter WHAT your doin, ust as long as you LOOK GOOD doin it

People ask me how far I've come. And I tell them twelve feet: from the audience to the stage.

Classic Van Halen made people want to dance and f**k. Modern Van Halen makes you want to drink milk and drive foreign cars.

Music is like girlfriends to me; I'm continually astonished by the choices other people make.

The best time is during the struggle. The top of the mountain is usually small, freezing and lonesome. To this day I'm continually reinvesting myself in something new. I'm not afraid to start as a beginner in anything.

I used to have a drug problem, but now I have enough money.

Rap is poetry to music, like beatniks without beards and bongos.

Maybe I'm like acts of Congress or your favorite Chinese restaurant - you don't really want to know what's going on behind the door. I'm a real study in contrast, I expect, looking from without. But it adds up to what you get on stage.

It's not who wants to sleep with you; It's who wants to sleep with you again.

I don't get all the women that I want... I get all the women that want me.

Rock & roll is not so much a question of electric guitars as it is striped pants.

I'm a family man. I personally started 3 or 4 families last year.

It doesn't matter the kind of music, it doesn't matter whether it's a cowboy hat or a yarmulke. I don't care if it's outer space or pop, the spirit is the same.

The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the front of an oncoming train.

Give me a glazed doughnut, and a bottle of anything... to go!

I know that people think I'm a party king; but, face it, if I finished the bottle every time I took a drink, I wouldn't be able to do the aerials I do onstage.

I always wanted to be an outrage to public decency and a threat to women. And this is one of the few occupations where you're not only allowed that, but you're encouraged.

Music journalists love Elvis Costello and hate me because they look like Elvis Costello

There are only so many letters in the alphabet. When I talk to young musicians or authors and they ask for advice, I say, You gotta learn all the letters of your own personal alphabet. With music, you need to know all the different kinds of music and everything in and around your given instrument.

I can teach you to jump up in five seconds-it takes years to learn how to land properly.

The only people who put iced tea in Jack Daniel's bottles is the Clash baby!

The problem with self-improvement is knowing when to quit.

I'm gonna abandon my spirit to them, which is actually what I attempt to do. You work yourself up into that state and you fall in supplication of the demon gods.

I take my personal upkeep real seriously; my sense of organization and attention to detail; my memory; my business - I love the business.

The most important part of any rock song is the guitar solo.

Ya know, I always admired Ray Kroc, the man who invented McDonald's. Ray had a vision of the most commonplace thing - a hamburger and fries to go - but to him it was just the greatest thing ever, and he was going to make it the greatest thing ever for everybody else, and he did.

It's always irritated me that people say, 'Where's the action? Oh wow, there's no action here; let's go somewhere else.' These people will never find the action.

You stick your head above the crowd and attract attention and sometimes somebody will throw a rock at you. That's the territory. You buy the land, you get the Indians.

In front of the camera and in front of the lens, there's no lawsuits, there's no agent, and there's most frequently no time limits... There's a longevity that's kind of built into it. I spend most of my time behind the scenes, and when it is time to perform, I'm genuinely delighted to do it.

Of course building a kitchen makes all the symmetric sense in the world because everybody's burning calories at 120 beats a minute. You could even register it on a graph at the DJ booth. "How fast are they burning calories, sir?" "126 a minute." "Are you sure?" "Oh, I'm very sure." You can meter that out.