Fortune Cookie Quotes

He who laughs at himself never runs out of things to laugh at.

If, even as the price to be paid for a fifth vote, I ever joined an opinion for the Court that began: 'The Constitution promises liberty to all within its reach, a liberty that includes certain specific rights that allow persons, within a lawful realm, to define and express their identity,' I would hide my head in a bag. The Supreme Court of the United States has descended from the disciplined legal reasoning of John Marshall and Joseph Story to the mystical aphorisms of the fortune cookie.

The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.

If you have a lemon; make lemonade.

Purpose, pattern, and people, the three P's at the heart of life.

If we followed our own advice, we'd be successful.

The best way to make children good is to make them happy.

A long life may not be good enough, but a good life is long enough.

Wealth can't buy heath, but heath can buy wealth.

What you earn depends on what you learn.

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last.

Always tell the truth - it's the easiest thing to remember.

Successful salesman: someone who has found a cure for the common cold shoulder.

God's promises are not fortune cookies. We do not use them in order to get a spiritual "fix" for the day.

One starts to get young at the age of sixty and then it is too late.

Service is what life is all about.

I just got a fortune cookie that says "Turn off your computer and read a book" which is odd because I'm WRITING a book...on my computer!

Success can corrupt; usefulness can only exalt.

Be wise with speed; a fool at forty is a fool indeed.

Success is never final.

Which reminds me of a fortune cookie: you often find your destiny on the path you take to avoid it.

It's better to have a bad plan then no plan at all.

Everything bows to success, even grammar.

Forget goals. Value the process.

Fortune cookies are a good idea. If the message is positive, it can make your day a little better.

At the state dinner for Chinese President Hu Jintao, Hu opened a fortune cookie that said, 'You will lend us another trillion dollars.'

The final act of business judgment is intuitive.

Warning: fortune cookies don't care what happens to you.

Success, remember is the reward of toil.

I cannot read a fortune cookie without breaking down and crying. I am sensitive.

Outward success alienates a man from himself.

You're not very good at being contemplative," Milo said. "You always sound like some bad caricature of a philosopher, like those fortune cookies with 'Confucius say' or the Nietzsche guy from Mystery Men that's always saying 'when you walk on the ground, the ground walks on you.

Once I opened up a fortune cookie and inside was the guy's cheque next to me I said hey buddy I got your cheque he said thanks.

Love of action is not industry.

Good places for aphorisms: in fortune cookies, on bumper stickers, and on banners flying over the Palace of Free Advice.

For children is there any happiness which is not also noise?

Most Americans don't know enough about basic economics to fill out one fortune cookie.

What thought or message would you put in a fortune cookie? "Stop reading this. Eat the cookie and live your life.

Twitter... 140 character limit... must be a great tool for fortune cookie writers.