1.
If you pay peanuts, you wind up hiring monkeys.
Unknown
If you offer a pittance, you will end up recruiting incompetents.
2.
You can get the monkey off your back, but the circus never leaves town
Anne Lamott
5.
Pardon me, but we did not have the time to exchange that kind of personal information," Magnus said. "I could not have known! Moreover, I wish to assure both of you that I did not make any amorous advances on female monkeys." he paused and winked. "I didn't actually see any, so I never got the chance.
Cassandra Clare
6.
Your mind makes you dance like a monkey all the time... Now you have to become stronger; you have to make the mind dance. Make it dance on the stage of mantra. For that, mediate and repeat mantra.
Swami Muktananda
7.
Dogs, monkeys, and parrots are a thousand times less miserable than we are.
Voltaire
8.
What we must do is start viewing every cow, pig, chicken, monkey, rabbit, mouse, and pigeon as our family members.
Gary Yourofsky
9.
"Monkey bars," Annabeth said. "I'm great at these." She leaped onto to the first rung and started swinging her way across. She was scared of tiny spiders, but not of plummeting to her death from a set of monkey bars. Go figure.
Rick Riordan
10.
There's a statistical theory that if you gave a million monkeys typewriters and set them to work, they'd eventually come up with the complete works of Shakespeare. Thanks to the Internet, we now know this isn't true.
Ian Hart
11.
God likes a little humor, as is evidence by the fact that he made the monkeys, the parrot -- and some of you people.
Billy Sunday
12.
A monkey is a much better voter than a socialist. Statistically speaking, if we assume that there are two options to choose from: the "A" and the "B" - the monkey is voting randomly, so its wrong 50% of the time. The socialist, however - is always wrong.
Janusz Korwin-Mikke
13.
Year by year, the monkey's mask reveals the monkey
Matsuo Basho
15.
What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
Mark Twain
16.
One dies only if he's not anymore in the hearts and minds of those who know him. - Monkey D. Luffy
Eiichiro Oda
17.
Moreover, I wish to assure you both that I did not make any amorous advances on female monkeys.
Cassandra Clare
18.
My way of learning is to heave a wild and unpredictable monkey-wrench into the machinery.
Dashiell Hammett
19.
Evolution isn't true, because if we evolved from monkeys, how can they still be here?
Stephen Baldwin
21.
Instead of holding on to the Biblical view that we are made in the image of God, we come to realize that we are made in the image of the monkey.
Lin Yutang
22.
Southerners ask intimate questions in the way monkeys groom each other for lice, not to pry but to make you feel cared for.
Reynolds Price
24.
You know, if you have a zoo you don't want the other creatures to see you. You want them to hang out and act properly and, you know, when the monkeys will come and ask for the bananas, they won't act like monkeys. If you want them to act on what their true nature is, you've got to leave them alone.
Tarsem Singh
25.
We have changed. We are no longer, as I said, bipedal monkeys. We are instead a kind of cybernetic coral reef of organic components and inorganic technological components.
Terence McKenna
26.
No, monkeys are still having babies, why don't they have another human today?
Kent Hovind
27.
Why should I question the monkey when I can question the organ grinder.
Aneurin Bevan
28.
I learned the way a monkey learns - by watching its parents.
Prince Charles
29.
A blindfolded monkey throwing darts at a newspaper's financial pages could select a portfolio that would do just as well as one carefully selected by experts.
Burton Malkiel
30.
Millions and millions of exuberant monkeys are creating an endless digital forest of mediocrity.
Andrew Keen
31.
"Softly, softly, catchee monkey," is the West African rendering of a very valuable precept. An awful lot of men fail through lack of patient persistence.
Robert Baden-Powell
33.
The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity.
Peter Kay
34.
There's no right. There's no wrong. There's only popular opinion.
Brad Pitt
35.
Like pregnant women lose their teeth feeding the stranger, junkies lose their yellow fangs feeding the monkey.
William S. Burroughs
37.
Our ancestors were very rich and eminent people, and they left us an enormous inheritance, which we have completely forgotten, especially since the time when we began to consider ourselves the descendants of a monkey.
P.D. Ouspensky
38.
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost. She should go far. The sooner she starts, the better. The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of its behind.
Joseph Stilwell
41.
Paleontologists do not have to search for famous "missing link" from which humans supposedly came, and current great apes. This link is simply the socialist - because he has both monkey genes.
Janusz Korwin-Mikke
42.
An infinite number of monkeys typing into GNU emacs would never make a good program.
Linus Torvalds
43.
I don't want my Patronus to be a monkey! Even though that's totally what it is.
Margot Robbie
44.
Darwinian man, though well-behaved, at best is only a monkey shaved.
W. S. Gilbert
45.
Some say that AIDS came from the monkeys, and I doubt that because we have been living with monkeys from time immemorial, others say it was a curse from God, but I say it cannot be that.
Wangari Maathai
48.
Cats and monkeys; monkeys and cats; all human life is there.
Henry James
49.
It does get old to have to always be a monkey in a zoo. I don't know what it's like any more to be anonymous.
Kevin Bacon
50.
What I am interested in with birds, just as I am with spiders or monkeys, is what they do and why they do it.
David Attenborough