1.
Life is a dream for the wise, a game for the fool, a comedy for the rich, a tragedy for the poor.
Sholom Aleichem
2.
No matter how bad things get, you got to go on living, even if it kills you.
Sholom Aleichem
3.
This is an ugly and mean world, and only to spite it we mustn't weep. If you want to know, this is the constant source of my good spirit, of my humor. Not to cry, out of spite, only to laugh out of spite, only to laugh.
Sholom Aleichem
4.
You see how it is, my dear friends. There's no pleasing everyone. It's hopeless to even try, and the more you play the peacemaker, the less peaceful things become.
Sholom Aleichem
5.
One cannot live on potatoes alone. It is said that one wants bread with potatoes. And when there's no bread, a Jew takes his stick, and goes through the village in search of business.
Sholom Aleichem
6.
If you listen carefully, you get to hear everything you didn't want to hear in the first place.
Sholom Aleichem
7.
Gossip is nature's telephone.
Sholom Aleichem
8.
The rich swell up with pride, the poor from hunger.
Sholom Aleichem
9.
If somebody tells you you have ears like a donkey, pay no attention. But if two people tell you, buy yourself a saddle.
Sholom Aleichem
10.
It is an old custom amongst Jewish children, to become war-like on the 'L'ag Beomer.' They arm themselves from head to foot with wooden swords, pop-guns and bows and arrows. They take food with them, and go off to wage war.
Sholom Aleichem
11.
To go to the synagogue with one's father on the Passover eve - is there in the world a greater pleasure than that? What is it worth to be dressed in new clothes from head to foot, and to show off before one's friends? Then the prayers themselves - the first Festival evening prayer and blessing.
Sholom Aleichem
12.
Without love our life is ... a ship without a rudder ... like a body without a soul.
Sholom Aleichem
13.
There are people who have never been taught anything, and know everything, have never been anywhere, and understand everything, have never given a moment's thought to anything, and comprehend everything. 'Blessed hands' is the name bestowed on these fortunate beings. The world envies, honours and respects them.
Sholom Aleichem
14.
The worm in the radish doesn't think there is anything sweeter.
Sholom Aleichem
15.
You can take a Jew out of a shtetl, but you cannot take a shtetl out of a Jew.
Sholom Aleichem
16.
A wise word is not a substitute for a piece of herring.
Sholom Aleichem
17.
I never turn down a drink. Among friends it’s always appropriate. A man is only a man as they say, but brandy is still brandy. You’ll find that in the Talmud too.
Sholom Aleichem
18.
When the heart is full it runs out of the eyes.
Sholom Aleichem
19.
I will never permit myself to give in to American taste and lower the standards of art.
Sholom Aleichem
20.
A real pleasure is a pleasure that one enjoys by one's self, without a companion, and without a single argument.
Sholom Aleichem
21.
Love is a taste of paradise.
Sholom Aleichem
22.
Barking dogs don't bite, but they themselves don't know it.
Sholom Aleichem
23.
A cantor, when he starts singing, it's like rain - once it starts, it's hard to stop.
Sholom Aleichem
24.
Playing nuts is a game like any other, neither better than tops, nor worse than cards. The game is played in various ways. There are 'holes' and 'bank' and 'caps.' But every game finishes up in the same way. One boy loses, another wins. And, as always, he who wins is a clever fellow, a smart fellow, a good fellow.
Sholom Aleichem
25.
A bachelor is a man who comes to work each morning from a different direction.
Sholom Aleichem
26.
A kind word is no substitute for a piece of herring or a bag of oats.
Sholom Aleichem
27.
They say that children become men, and men become children. Many generations have grown up, become men, and gone hence.
Sholom Aleichem
28.
When have you ever heard of a cantor or any artist turning anyone down when he is strongly urged to perform?
Sholom Aleichem
29.
To make people laugh was almost a sickness with me.
Sholom Aleichem
30.
Here lies a plain and simple Jew who wrote in plain and simple prose.
Sholom Aleichem
31.
No one knows whom the shoe pinches - no one.
Sholom Aleichem
32.
Ah, how many luxuries has the good God prepared for his Jewish children.
Sholom Aleichem
33.
Each Jew must either give or take tzedakah [charity] for Passover.
Sholom Aleichem
34.
Remember, you must not sleep at the Seder. If you do, Elijah the Prophet will come with a bag on his shoulders. On the two first nights of Passover, Elijah the Prophet goes about looking for those who have fallen asleep at the Seder, and takes them away in his bag.
Sholom Aleichem