Aspirin Quotes

I don't take any of the medications I took when I was younger: antibiotics, antacids, aspirin, asthma inhalers, ulcer medication, allergy shots.

Aspirin is perfectly legal, but if you take 13 of them motherf***ers, it'll be your last headache.

Shoulder-in is the aspirin of horseback riding - it cures everything.

We have had two chickens in every pot, two cars in every garage, and now we have two headaches for every aspirin.

When there's an ache, you want to be like aspirin, not vitamins. Aspirin solves a very particular problem someone has, whereas vitamins are a general "nice to have" market.

Pop music is aspirin and the blues are vitamins.

Oh! kangaroos, sequins, chocolate sodas! / You really are beautiful! Pearls, / harmonicas, jujubes, aspirins!

I took the two most expensive aspirins in history.

Aspirin will not bring dead hookers back to life.

You know, back in my days they used Bayer aspirin for contraception. The gals put it between their knees and it wasn't that costly.

Peacekeeping works in some situations, but it very often needs other ingredients. Peacekeeping is not the aspirin of international security.

Cinema never saved anyone's life, it is not a medicine that will save anyone's life. It is only an aspirin.

After quitting radio I was able to live on the money I saved on aspirins.

I realize now that taking drugs was like taking an aspirin without having a headache.

We are not bearing our crosses every time we have a headache; an aspirin tablet will take care of that. What is meant is the trouble we would not have if we were not Christians.

I don't even take aspirin.

What I found does the most good is just to get into a taxi and go to Tiffany's. It calms me down right away, the quietness and the proud look of it;nothing very bad could happen to you there.

Friends seem to be like aspirin; we don't really know why they make a sick person feel better, but they do.

George Brett could get good wood on an aspirin.

My head is pounding. I wish the mints were aspirin.

Rusty thinks I should smoke marijuana, and I did for a while, but it only makes me giggle.

Most things in this world don´t work, aspirin do.

Elizabeth Taylor's so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.

The pressure gets worse the older you get. The hole starts to look the size of a Bayer aspirin.

Clowns work as well as aspirin, but twice as fast.

A couple drinks. A couple aspirin. Repeat.

Exercise is the most awful illusion. The secret is a lot of aspirin and marrons glaces.

The firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.

In 1844, Karl Marx said, "Religion is the opiate of the masses." He said this at a time when opium and opium derivatives were the only painkillers. And he said it helped a little. He might as well have said, "Religion is the aspirin of the people."

Professionalism in medicine has given us medial miracles for the affluent but hospitals that will charge $35 for aspirin.

I would say that it's an awfully overrated aspirin and very similar to the old people's Disneyland.

When a regular person gets sick, they take an aspirin. When a writer gets sick, they take notes.