Bobby Heenan Quotes

You win some and you lose some. Unless you're Virgil, then you lose them all.

You know they say money can't buy happiness. Give me 50 bucks and watch me smile

I'm a legend in this sport. If you don't believe me, ask me

Its a dog eat dog world, and Mr. Perfect is a Milk Bone.

The two things that scare me most about wrestling fans is that they're allowed to vote and allowed to reproduce.

Tito Santana is like a cue-ball. The more you strike him, the more english you get out of him.

Remember folks, fish are like relatives. After two days, they stink.

There's nothing better than a good, blind referee.

Janetty tried to dive through the window to escape, what an act of cowardice.

I once asked him what came at the end of the sentence... and he said "parole".

And for those of you that dropped out of high school, remember the famous phrase: 'Do you want fries with that?'

If you're poor and you do something stupid, you're nuts. If you're rich and do something stupid, you're eccentric.

North Dakota State. What do you have to do there to graduate? Milk a cow with your left hand?

Koko B. Ware … his mom’s first name was Tupper.

This guy makes coffee nervous.

I'd love to be popular in Barcelona. That sounds like a fun job

I know all about cheating. I've had six very successful marriages.

By the time The Iron Sheik gets to the ring, it will be Wrestlemania 37!

To Jim Duggan, taking a shower is a high risk maneuver.

They're living proof that the 3 stooges had children.

He's not pointing to anybody, he's showing off how high he can count!

Hawaii's the 50th state? I thought it was a suburb of Guam.

Stu Hart trained all his kids--only three of them use the litter box.

It's very hard to get out of this hold, that's why you either have to scoot backwards, move forwards, or try to get up.

The money's the same, whether you earn it or scam it.

There's a counter for every hold and a hold for every counter, and a lunch counter for every person that you know Schivone.

I asked Stu Hart earlier. I said, 'Stu, you gotta be proud of your boys.' He said, 'I have boys?'

Are there any swamps in Oklahoma? Yes, there is. It's called Tulsa.

He's the only man I know of who can hide his own easter eggs.

Once you wrestke Rikki Atakki, an hour later you want to wrestle him again.

The bad thing about the Bushwhackers is that win, lose, or draw, you gotta have everything you got on fumigated.

What are you doing, looking at me with one eye and chasing a fly with the other?

Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire. They're a lovely twosome, or threesome, or foursome, or twenty-fifthsome.

This (Paris,France) wouldn't be a bad place, but it's full of Frenchmen.

[On Sting] He threw a sucker punch. There's the sucker who threw the punch. Him the the Bart Simpson hair doo.

Have you ever been to Glens Falls? The city limits signs are on the same post.

There's the downtown area of Tupelo. Did you see the skyscrapers? Two stories.

When's the last time you went into a barber shop and saw everyone there unconsious?

You're 83? Really? You don't look it. I would've guessed 81 or 82.

You'd have a good voice, if it ever came out of your throat

Obviously some cheap motel is missing a shower curtain.

I heard a rumor that your mom and dad ran away from home.

He looks like something that fell out of a deck of cards!

Its amazing that Lou Ferrigno can talk with fifty pounds of cracker in his mouth.

Just look at the way he hangs in mid air!

There's only two kinds of music I don't like....Country and Western.

If you ever had your moon salted you'd know how painful that could be.

Oh, I knew he was gonna do that. I just knew he was gonna do that. He don't need Jannetty. I told you that off and on.

When The Phenoix Suns are missing two basketballs, they'll know where to look!

You don't have to yell at me Schiavone. I'm not blind!