Funny Sex Quotes

Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.

No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.

What I like about masturbation is that you don't have to talk afterwards.

Sex is the biggest nothing of all time.

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

The French are funny, sex is funny, and comedies are funny, yet no French sex comedies are funny.

During sex I fantasize that I'm someone else.

I don't have sex drive... I have sex 'just sit in the car and hope someone gets in'.

Usually I'm on top to keep the guy from escaping.