Funny Sex Quotes

Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.

No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.

What I like about masturbation is that you don't have to talk afterwards.

Sex is the biggest nothing of all time.

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

During sex I fantasize that I'm someone else.

I don't have sex drive... I have sex 'just sit in the car and hope someone gets in'.

The French are funny, sex is funny, and comedies are funny, yet no French sex comedies are funny.

Usually I'm on top to keep the guy from escaping.