Morey Amsterdam Quotes

My neighbor has two dogs. One of them says to the other, "Woof!" The other replies, "Moo!" The dog is perplexed. "Moo? Why did you say 'Moo'?" The other dog says, "I'm trying to learn a foreign language."

According to the statistics, a man eats a prune every twenty seconds. I don't know who this fellow is, but I know where to find him.

Even the police have an unlisted number.

People who live in glasshouses might as well answer the door

A Cannibal is a person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter.

Our Congress is the finest body of men money can buy.