1.
Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.
Wes Smith
2.
Never trust a woman whose father calls her 'Princess'. Chances are she believes it.
Wes Smith
3.
There is no such thing as a self-cleaning oven.
Wes Smith
4.
A $20 haircut hardly ever lasts longer than a $5 haircut.
Wes Smith
5.
Seek but provision of bread and wine, fools to flatter, and clothing fine; and nothing of God shall ever be thine.
Wes Smith
6.
The chief beneficiary of life insurance policies for young, single people is the life insurance agent.
Wes Smith
7.
There is nothing personal about a personal ad.
Wes Smith
8.
They aren't kidding when they say, "Wash Whites separately.
Wes Smith
9.
Always take an extra quarter to the laundry room.
Wes Smith
10.
Hurry up and learn patience.
Wes Smith
11.
If you have to learn it from a self-help book, you may be beyond help.
Wes Smith