Santa Quotes

No sane local official who has hung up an empty stocking over the municipal fireplace is going to shoot Santa Claus just before a hard Christmas.

I usually like to throw on some flip flops and go to a really nice lunch in Venice, or Santa Monica, or stay in and cook dinner.

I keep three hoes, But don't'call me Santa

The only school that let me in was U.C. Santa Cruz, which is where I went. They didn't have a journalism program, so I took sociology, which is the closest thing to journalism.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!

I'm Santa Claus to these hoes without a reindeer.

If Mitt Romney was Santa Claus, he would fire the reindeer and outsource the elves.

Santa will be showing up with Rudolph the Red-Eyed Reindeer.

Postal officials say that before Christmas they receive tons of letters written to Santa Claus, but after Christmas how few letters of thanks are sent to him! From childhood onward, human beings seem to be characterized by thanklessness.

Please be informed, there is a Santa Claus.

To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with my pants down.

Our family was too strange and weird for even Santa Claus to come visit ... Santa, who was jolly - but, let's face it, he was also very judgmental.

I'm the only one who still believes in Santa Claus!

There are a few YouTube clips of me singing at The King's Head in Santa Monica, so you can see how bad I am.

I keep 3 hos but don't call me Santa And I'm and I'm flyer than reindeers in winter

Snowball just leads elves on, elves and Santas. He is playing a dangerous game.

Yes Virginia, There is a Santa Claus.

By the way, Santa just is white.

Here comes Santa Claus! Here comes Santa Claus! Right down Santa Claus Lane!

The greatest thing is not to believe in Santa Claus; it is to be Santa Claus.

I live in Santa Cruz. I moved here in 1974 and couldn't leave.

Anybody who is born in Santa Rosa must turn out to be either an artist or a poet, for the spirit of the hills gets into your blood out there.

You better watch out You better not cry Better not pout I'm telling you why Santa Claus is coming to town

Someone once said that taxes are the price we pay for civilization. That may have been true when he said it, but today taxes are mostly the price we pay so that politicians can play Santa Claus and get reelected.

Those North Korean hackers are at it again. Earlier today they leaked Santa's naughty list.

I see Santa Claus and Joseph Smith and Luke Skywalker as the same person.

If you can delude yourself by believing that there is some kind of Santa Claus out there who is going to bail you out in the end, then it will help you get through. Even if you are proven wrong in the end, you would have had a better life than a non-believer.

What kind of Christmas present would Jesus ask Santa for?

I'm not going to make a present of Santa.

Aren't we forgeting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.

I love Christmas! I'm not religious, but I love the trappings of the season. I love the decorations, and the music, and Santa, and the festive food, and the cinnamon- and vanilla-infused aromas.

Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.

I joined the board of the Santa Fe Institute.

The real Santa Claus is at the mall.

All the world is happy when Santa Claus comes.

For the most part, people use God as Santa Claus.

When Tim Allen made The Santa Clause, I thought that was a delightful film. It took a modern sensibility but layered onto it a kind of sentiment.

The only thing wrong with the U.S. economy is the failure of the Republican Party to play Santa Claus.

If the Pilgrims had landed in Santa Monica Bay rather than Boston, we'd have six states out here!

I was born in Santa Monica but brought up abroad so I don't use English much.

Everyone thinks of God as a man - you can't help it - Santa Claus was a man, therefore God has to be a man.

"Please stop," I said. "You're upsetting the black Santas."

Grown ups don't believe in Santa Claus. They vote.

One of the things I had a hard time getting used to when I came to California in '78 was Santa Claus in shorts.

Christmas always sucked when I was a kid because I believed in Santa Claus. Unfortunately, so did my parents. So I never got anything.

What about Santa's cookies? I suppose 'parents' eat those, too?

Unwisely, Santa offered a teddy bear to James, unaware he had been mauled by a grizzly earlier this year.

Not everyone who sells Christmas trees believes in Santa Claus.

The title of that great Christmas song was 'Boogie Woogie Santa Claus,' and no one ever heard of it.

You know, in a way, 'Dear Santa Claus' is rather stuffy... Perhaps something a little more intimate would be better... Something just a shade more friendly..." "How about 'Dear Fatty'?