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Jim Davidson Quotes

English comedian, Birth: 13-12-1953
1.
Scientists have discovered a food that reduces a woman's sex drive by 99%. Wedding cake.
Jim Davidson

2.
On quiet nights, when I'm alone, I like to run our wedding video backwards, just to watch myself walk out of the church a free man.
Jim Davidson

3.
I took the wife out last night; one punch!
Jim Davidson

4.
Always say no to drugs. It will drive the prices down.
Jim Davidson

5.
I don't believe in predestined fate. The future is what we choose to create.
Jim Davidson

Similar Authors: George Carlin Jay Leno Bill Maher David Letterman Jon Stewart Stephen Colbert Jimmy Fallon Craig Ferguson Mitch Hedberg Jim Gaffigan Rodney Dangerfield Ellen DeGeneres Robin Williams Joan Rivers David Sedaris
6.
When we have an item that has value to the school and the athletic department, we cannot throw it away just to be fair.
Jim Davidson

7.
People who do stupid things with hazardous materials often die.
Jim Davidson