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Toasters Quotes

1.
Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn't even in the same neighborhood. No one has ever gotten a religious experience out of removing burned-on cheese from the grill of the toaster oven.
Erma Bombeck

Authors on Toasters Quotes: Erma Bombeck Sam Levenson Paul Auster Charlie Sheen Mary E. Pearson Dean Koontz Karl Pilkington Sarah Rees Brennan Peter Kay Christopher Moore Mohamed El-Erian Douglas Adams Neil Gaiman Elizabeth Scott Tim Cook Bruce Greenwald Drake Mark S. Fowler Tom Robbins Alfred Hitchcock Douglas Coupland Li Cunxin Dane Cook Thomas M. Disch Walt Mossberg Akinyele Janet Evanovich Dave Barry Russell Brand
2.
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?
Peter Kay

3.
I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.
Dane Cook

4.
Indeed, everything was a shock at the beginning. The wash machines, dryers, dishwashers, garbage disposal machines, juicers, toasters, and yes, the ATM machines. Watching money spilled out of a wall was simply amazing!
Li Cunxin

5.
Today's scientific question is: What in the world is electricity? And where does it go after it leaves the toaster?
Dave Barry

6.
Television is like the American toaster, you push the button and the same thing pops up everytime.
Alfred Hitchcock

7.
Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.
Sam Levenson

8.
What I think is all I have left. My mind is the only thing that makes me different from a fancy toaster. What we think does matter-it's all we truly have.
Mary E. Pearson

9.
Television is just another appliance- It's just a toaster with pictures.
Mark S. Fowler

10.
Long lives aren't natural. We forget that senior citizens are as much an invention as toasters or penicillin.
Douglas Coupland

11.
I have avoided becoming stale by putting a little water on the plate, lying on the plate, and having myself refreshed in a toaster oven for 23 minutes once every month.
Dean Koontz

12.
And we've got a toaster and everything. So there is no reason for the wedding.
Karl Pilkington

13.
In the long run, everything is a toaster.
Bruce Greenwald

14.
But the toaster was quite satisfied with itself, thank you. Though it knew from magazines that there were toasters who could toast four slices at a time, it didn't think that the master, who lived alone and seemed to have few friends, would have wanted a toaster of such institutional proportions. With toast, it's quality that matters, not quantity.
Thomas M. Disch

15.
The available worlds looked pretty grim. They had little to offer him because he had little to offer them. He had been extremely chastened to realize that although he originally came from a world which had cars and computers and ballet and Armagnac, he didn't, by himself, know how any of it worked. He couldn't do it. Left to his own devices he couldn't build a toaster. He could just about make a sandwich and that was it.
Douglas Adams

16.
To leave the world a little better than you found it. That's the best a man can ever do.
Paul Auster

17.
Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn't even in the same neighborhood.
Erma Bombeck

18.
The last time I used? What do you mean? I used my toaster this morning.
Charlie Sheen

19.
My full name is Lauren Lee Smith. Of all the names I could have been given, that's the one I got. Lauren Lee Smith. It has all the personality of a toaster.
Elizabeth Scott

20.
I saw you put rice in a toaster once," said Mae. "I was there when made the tin of beans explode." "It was faulty," Jamie protested, his eyes shifty. " I am sure of this.
Sarah Rees Brennan

21.
Not unlike the toaster, I control darkness.
Christopher Moore

22.
I remember when I was growing up, you would go to a bank to open a deposit, and they'd give you a toaster. A free toaster. These days, if you're a company, and you go to a bank, they could easily turn you away! They don't want your deposits anymore.
Mohamed El-Erian

23.
Virginia is the place, where, technologically speaking, they will burn people at the stake for possessing such things as toasters.
Neil Gaiman

24.
I think anything can be forced to converge. The problem is that products are about tradeoffs, and you begin to make tradeoffs to the point where what you have left at the end of the day doesn't please anyone. You can converge a toaster and a refrigerator, but those things are probably not going to be pleasing to the user.
Tim Cook

25.
Burn bread every day boy, no toaster
Drake

26.
I don't want to give the impression that I hold daily conversations with my household appliances, although my toaster is as old as Drew Barrymore and almost as talented.
Tom Robbins

27.
Why shouldn't a PC work like a refrigerator or a toaster?
Walt Mossberg

28.
When I need bread, I grab the toaster and stick niggas for they crumbs.
Akinyele

29.
He rooted for the Mets, he wore Foot of the Loom underwear, and he drove a Buick. His loyalties were carved in stone and he wasn't about to be impressed with some upstart of a toaster salesman who drove a Bonneville.
Janet Evanovich

30.
Democracy is a gleaming Excalibur - let's not use it just to mend the toaster.
Russell Brand