1.
Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?
Benny Hill
Have you observed that all those advocating for contraception are already alive?
2.
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Benny Hill
3.
I'm not against half naked girls - not as often as I'd like to be.
Benny Hill
4.
Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.
Benny Hill
5.
Do unto others, then run
Benny Hill
6.
Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish.
Benny Hill
7.
That's what show business is, sincere insincerity.
Benny Hill
8.
Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason... now I have a reason.
Benny Hill
9.
Live everyday as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
Benny Hill
10.
Those hot pants of hers were so damned tight, I could hardly breathe.
Benny Hill
11.
Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.
Benny Hill
12.
Did you ever notice that everyone in favour of birth control has already been born ?
Benny Hill
13.
The odds against there being a bomb on a plane are a million to one, and against two bombs a million times a million to one. Next time you fly, cut the odds and take a bomb.
Benny Hill
14.
I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.
Benny Hill
15.
Why would I make one woman so miserable when I can make so many women very happy?
Benny Hill
16.
I never yell, I never tell, but I'm grateful as hell.
Benny Hill